Soft Skills

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NLP stands for “Neuro Linguistic Programming”. This refers to the fact that we have a mind-body system that can be programmed in a way we programmed software for a computer.

 

Neuro: -

Refers to our nervous system that enables us to breathe, live, think and function.

Linguistic: -

The symbol systems that run the neurology.

Programming: -

The habitual patterns of behaviour, like thought, created by the impact of language on the brain.

“NLP is an attitude and a methodology that leaves behind a trail of techniques.” (Richard Bandler).

NLP deals with how our thoughts, actions and feelings work together right now to produce our experience.

 

mapisnotthe territorry 1. The map is not the territory:

Our mental maps of the world are not the world and therefore, we respond directly to our maps, rather than the world.

point 2

2. Experience has a structure:

Our thoughts and memories have a pattern. Therefore, when we change that pattern or structure, our experiences automatically change. We can thus, neutralize unpleasant memories and enrich memories that can serve us.
point no 3 3. If one person can do something, anyone can learn to do it:

Many people think that certain things are impossible without ever going out and trying them. Pretend that everything is possible. Where there is a physical or environmental limit, the world of experience will let us know about it.
mind and body are parts of the same syatem4. The mind and body are parts of the system:


Our thoughts instantly affect our, muscle tension, breathing, feelings and more. When we learn to change any one, we have learnt to change the other.

resources are available 5. People already have all the resources they need:

Some people seem to be smarter or naturally happier or more talented than others are. It is because they have made a wonderful match between their inner resources and their opportunities in the world. If we were to look at those resources in more detail, we could see that each of them is made up of images, sounds, physical motor skills and feelings.


point 6 6. We cannot “NOT” communicate:


We are always communicating, if not verbally, at least non verbally and words are the least important. Even our thoughts are communications with ourselves and they reveal to others through our eyes, voice tones, postures and body movements.

Feedback 7. There is no failure, only feedback:

Viewing an experience an expecting the result as a failure leads to defeat and resignation. Instead using the experience and reviewing the result as a feedback leads to learning and choice. Taking each experience as a feedback helps us to carry on.
communication is the response you get 8. The meaning of a communication is the response we get:

Others receive what we say and do through their mental map. When someone hears something different from what we mean, it is a change for us to notice that communication means what is received. It is important to observe how our communication was received which helps us to modify or improve it, so that next time, it is better or clear.


positive behaviour 9. Underlying every behaviour is a positive behaviour:


Every hurtful, harmful and thoughtless behaviour has a positive purpose in its original situation. Shouting in order to get noticed, hitting to prevent danger and hiding to feel safe are some examples. Looking a little deeper, we can separate these actions from the person’s positive intension, instead of condemning the actions. This helps in creating more positive choices to improve the same intension.



making choice

10. People are always making the best choices available to them:

Each person has his/her own unique personal history. Based on this, we have learnt what to do, and how to do it, what to want, and how to want it, what to value, and how to value it, what to learn and how to learn it. Based on this experience, we must make up all our choices. When new and better ones are added, we now have more choices.


do something else 11. If what you are doing is not working, do something else, or do anything else:


If we do what we have always done, we will get what we have been always getting. Therefore, if we want something new, let’s do something new, particularly when there are so many alternatives.